To Live Alone, again

Why is it so difficult for me to live alone? Is it because I have got used to him. There have been multiple occasions in the past where he has been away but I always have had a miserable memory of it. Not sure why? It is not that in those instances I was actually miserable. On the contrary, I had really good times with friends and family. But in those good times too I always wished that he was with me and that he is missing these good times. I am not dependent on him for my day to day chores. I can manage it quite alright. But still I miss him. Wish that he is with me. I guess, these long distances make you realize how important someone is to you and how much you need them. I guess this phase is quite enjoyable that you are feeling these complex emotions and some where he too is missing you... May be not as much to write about it... :)

This is my Infy :)

So here it comes, probably my last week in Infosys.

I have had a very emotional relationship with this company. Not because it paid me (peanuts) but because it made me who I am today, professionally as well as personally.

This was my first company (always a special relation),

the first time I left home and lived alone (in a guest house which was more comfortable than home),

got my first pay check here (Ahhh to see a bank balance in your name and which you have hard earned, what a joy!)

learnt not be afraid to speak your mind in front of people elder to you or more experienced to you (Thanks to Indian Culture we are taught to do the exact reverse),

learnt to do job in the correct way (pls note, not right or wrong way, but the correct way),

met amazing people here (list of friends and colleagues (who got lost too) is looong),

got re-acquainted to a distance cousin (who is my best and worst friend at the same time (can someone beat that?)),

met my future husband here (and had few lovely time off with him here(even till the last month))....

And a place where I got the confidence (first time in my life) that I am actually really good in something (credit - back to back good CRRs)

The list can go on...

Infosys is different than any company. The huge campuses, the large infrastructure, the large teams, process oriented work, brilliant people (and the super dumb lot too), the unexplained rules, the swipe ins and outs, the 9.15 hour clause, the tie (which are lost terms now), the huge MLPL, the weird shaped buildings (the ECC and the Anda building), the numerous blue colored umbrellas at the entrance of each building (which don’t seem numerous when it rains), the bus bay (can you imagine a huge area just dedicated to the company buses), the lovely and lush green cricket ground (there comes the twinkle in Mr. A’s eyes), the multiple food courts with multiple choices, the recreational facilities (which I admit I was a rare user), the pool facing Cafe Coffee Day, exotic birds chirping in lush green garden, the special CCD kiosk near gate-1 (covered with huge green trees and the squirrels running around fearlessly (Mr. A and my favorite place)), the journey from Home to Office and back (Initially the bus rides and then the lovely car rides (Not lovely for someone who was driving (Thanks to the much talked HJW traffic))...

Again the list can go on (will be updated as I will miss them)..

The last time I left Infosys, I felt bad but not as hallow as I feel today (as if I am leaving a part of me behind). At that time, it was more of missing friends more than this organization. Today, I feel that I will miss the organization as a whole. All the above things and of course the ring of the text on the last day of the month telling me that there is a credit transaction in your account….